Written by: Habibullah Asad
As the hour needle ticked 2, I knew I had been up all night restless and unusual than my normal routine. Strict to my schedule and chores, I somewhat found solace and comfort out in my lawn. It was a cold December night but something about this night was different, something about this night was mysterious yet captivating. Slurping on my coffee slowly yet confusingly, my eyes laid upon the roses which I had planted myself with such passion and joy as if I’d never see them wither. But Alas today I see them slowly turn dry and black.
Everything I passioned about, in the present moment was dark; for instance the sky, coffee, roses and above all my soul which once was pure and beautiful like that of a child.
“What was the lord trying to infer? Why had he called me out at this time of the night when I should have been taking a relaxing nap? What was it about tonight that was so different from all the other 6 nights?” All sorts of questions were running through my mind, but the most scariest of the questions that were raised by my conscience was “Had I; a man of faith and belief finally lost faith?, how can I?, how could I? Is that why the lord called me out tonight? To show me the darkness within my soul?” And then it clicked me, the lord wanted to show me that I, a man of love and faith who once had a soul as pure and radiant like a rose has finally withered.
I believed in the lord from the depth of my heart, I knew. It was just the word “love” I had lost faith in or was it the opposite, I couldn’t think clearly just yet. As the hour needle now ticked 4, my coffee lay their amidst my perplexed thoughts with all sorts of possible conclusions. Slowly yet painfully, I started admitting the fact that “love is beyond every religion and belief” and what tonight the lord showed me was bigger than losing faith in him, because I knew that can’t happen, and so did the lord. He knew I couldn’t betray my creator but he knew I had lost faith in the most beautiful thing he bestowed upon this world which was “love” itself.
It was getting colder each minute like the last experience I had with love, but at the moment I felt myself in the presence of the lord himself, I for the first time felt as it was just me and my creator and this night he deemed fit to let me cleanse my soul. Maybe he didn’t want me to lose faith in love because after all, “Faith in love surpasses faith of every kind.” And it’s the bond of love that connects an ordinary man with the divine and supreme lord.
Never in my life I had thought so deeply of love, maybe because I never wanted to? Maybe I was too scared? But tonight, the sky was clear, the stars were bright and my soul was cleansing. How long had I lived with a withered soul? I don’t know, but how long had I been waiting for the lord to show me a sign? Forever. And that night I realised,
“Darkness is what leads a man to a light of divinity, and Love is the distance needed to travel.”